I always read FAQ as fack and I don’t plan on changing this
Hello, 911? *twirls phone cord around finger* sooooo how was your day? Did you arrest any bad guys?…No you hang up first! Hello? 911?
if melbourne is sooooo good, how come they’ve never won a single state of origin? marinate on that, you organic coffee drinking FUCKS
no mom, do not ask that relative if they want to talk to me next on the phone.
everyone calls it nightblogging but really it’s the australians
i like to think of my followers as a giant conga line and im at the front and whenever i get a new follower they receive a grass skirt and coconut bra and join the conga line and we all have a great time
australian wizards learn how to cast spells without saying the full spell because they’re lazy speakers
australian wizards are really good at non verbal spells because why…
i am the human version of the first piece of bread
every 5 seconds a woman gives birth to a baby. stop this woman.
fun fact: in Australia we don’t have money. When we want to buy something we exchange it with vegemite.
Never forget the vegimite recession of ‘05
that was a dark time in Australian history. I remember how my father left to hunt for more vegemite and never came back…
So there’s this place in New South Wales called Yass and there is a mcdonalds there and well…..
"my ass"open 24 hours
lady gaga as a mom